Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Another sect of Pieism found!

I didn't believe it either. But there I saw on wikipedia (you know, that very reliable source of information) that someone had edited a pieism article and added a link to a blog all about it.
Here it is.

So I e-mailed the guy and he said he came up with "The Book of Pie" while sitting in class one day. Now what's strange is that this mysterious guy practices a sect that doesn't actually EAT pie.
That's right...pie is so holy to them, they refuse to eat it. Talk about extreme! I just saw The DaVinci Code with all that Opeis Dai stuff...so this sect would be like the Pieism Opeis Dai. I'm pretty sure the followers put themselves into ovens and cook their bodies and hit themselves with whips that have pie servers attached to the ends. Stuff like that. I mean to love something so much but not have it? That's like marrying a hot woman and not having sex with it...-I mean her.

Of course what's even stranger is that there are now four seperate sects of Pieism. And all of them were created thinking that they were original over the past few years. It's kind of creepy if not inspiring, yes? Now really is the time for Pieism to rise up as the one true religion...with robots and ninjas and robot ninjas and even pirates. No robot pirates...'cause there's enough of them at Disneyland.

Want to do your own research on this?
Well, here's all the websites I know devoted to Pieism. There is more Pieism on the net...but those are usually on message boards. Type Pieism into GOOGLE and you'll see a lot of them.

This one.
The Holy Church of Pie.
The Pieism Group at MSN Groups.
and of course...
This new one.

All of these are individual sites. They're not connected. Each group "started" the religion. Undeniable proof at least that pie is good. We all believe in the greatness of pie. Soon this will have to be fact and not opinion...just like the sky is blue and the ocean is wet.

With all these different sects talking about Toilet Gods, Llamas, Hippos, Pies of War...how do you know which one is right to follow? Whose beliefs are true? Well, I'm not here to discriminate against my fellow Pieists. You should believe what you want to believe.
But all those stupid jerks are wrong. I'm right.

Come on...Llamas?! What the fuck?

9 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Interesting. I've known your Pieism first, so it's the one I hold to be most true. The Sacred Text A La Mode sits right on my desktop, for reference whenever I need it. And whenever anyone asks, I send them your link... After all, it started in the 1850's or so, right?

7:50 PM  
Blogger a duck said...

i too found this pieism first, so its still the one i refer to. still good to see other sects tho, to see other peoples views on the mighty pie in the sky

1:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have my own sect of pieism that isn't any o9f the ones there! It's called JoJo Pieism. We belive that the pie came to earth in the form of man, JoJo. Please add mine on the list!

12:54 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Add JoJo Pieism on the list please, its a new sect!

12:57 PM  
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5:21 PM  
Anonymous Deathunter said...

JoJo Pieism!

This is one of the few places I can find a refernce to JoJo Pieism on.It just goes to show how you need a website. Below are details on JoJo Pieism.


JoJo Pieism believes the pie has come to earth in the form of a man, JoJo. They follow the sacred scrolls of wisdom. There are 5 sects of pieism known. These include the sacred text a la mode and the holy church of pie. Strangely enough all the sects have come into being with out knowing about the others.

We think that there is a Jesus of pieism, pie in a human body. His name is JoJo. We also believe that all animals are sacred and should only by killed for food. This includes spiders, ants and even mosquitoes! We believe that cake is not holy but not evil either (the sects disagree on cakes, i don't about you). The holiest number is pi (3.14159 etc). Very holy people get to become pieits, a pie saint.You only go to hell for a certain time depending how bad you are before you go to itermed and finally pie heaven.

'''Spirits'''

Master: Lobster,Genghis Khan and Tabby Fat

Major: Cheese,Shark, Sumo, Lasanege and Bodyguard

Greater: 100000's, pretty powerful

Lesser: 100000000's, weak and puny

Thats it, if you want to know more try typing in JoJo Pieism into google,it may work!
May the Pie be with you!

12:46 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

NSU - 4efer, 5210 - rulez

8:58 PM  
Anonymous jojo said...

Visit http://www.jojo-pieism.tk to see JoJo Pieism's offical site.

9:44 AM  
Anonymous Fred Fred Burger said...

We don't eat pie because pie created the universe. Eating pie is like eating God. You just don't do that. We only eat pie on special holidays, because it is good. And Llamas are sacred because they were freinds of the Pie in the beginning.

7:18 PM  

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